Engineer%20-%20Your%20Might%20Be%20an%20Engineer%20if%20...%20(12/15/99)
 

Dear Mike, here are some funny statements about Engineers.  I am an Electrical Engineer and I can relate to some of them.  Maybe you can include them in one of your newsletters or post it on your site.  I believe that other Engineers would enjoy it same as I did.

Thank you for your newsletters and your site.  There is so much useful information for us Engineers.

Take care and God bless you.

YOU MIGHT BE AN ENGINEER IF...

  • The only jokes you receive are through e-mail.
  • At Christmas, it goes without saying that you will be the one to find the burnt-out bulb in the string.
  • Buying flowers for your girlfriend or spending the money to upgrade your RAM is a moral dilemma.
  • Everyone else on the Alaskan cruise is on deck peering at the scenery, and you are still on a personal tour of the engine room.
  • In college you thought Spring Break was a metal fatigue failure.
  • The salespeople at Circuit City can't answer any of your questions.
  • You are always late to meetings.
  • You are at an air show and know how fast the skydivers are falling.
  • You bought your wife a new CD ROM for her birthday.
  • You can quote scenes from any Monty Python movie.
  • You can type 70 words a minute but can't read your own handwriting.
  • You can't write unless the paper has both horizontal and vertical lines.
  • You comment to your wife that her straight hair is nice and parallel.
  • You forgot to get a haircut ... for 6 months.
  • You go on the rides at Disneyland and sit backwards in the chairs to see how they do the special effects.
  • You have Dilbert comics displayed anywhere in your work area.
  • You have ever saved the power cord from a broken appliance.
  • You have more friends on the Internet than in real life.
  • You have never bought any new underwear or socks for yourself since you got married.
  • You have used coat hangers and duct tape for something other than hanging coats and taping ducts.
  • You know what http:// actually stands for.
  • You look forward to Christmas only to put together the kids' toys.
  • You own one or more white short-sleeve dress shirts.
  • You see a good design and still have to change it.
  • You spent more on your calculator than on your wedding ring.
  • You still own a slide rule and you know how to work it.
  • You think that when people around you yawn, it's because they didn't get enough sleep.
  • You wear black socks with white tennis shoes (or vice versa).
  • You window shop at Radio Shack.
  • You're in the back seat of your car, she's looking wistfully at the moon, and you're trying to locate a geosynchronous satellite.
  • You know what the geosynchronous satellite function is.
  • Your checkbook always balances.
  • Your laptop computer costs more than your car.
  • Your wife hasn't the foggiest idea what you do at work.
  • Your wristwatch has more computing power than a 300Mhz Pentium.
  • You've already calculated how much you make per second.
  • You've ever tried to repair a $5 radio.

From Zvonimir (Bill) Repar, Electrical Engineer, zrepar@newelectric.com

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